Monthly Archives: June 2014

Silent Hill: The Movie

 

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this is your face on silent hill

Way back in October of last year I did a series of posts on the Silent Hill franchise. It was initially supposed to encompass the movies and various spin-off materials but went unfinished due to NaNoWriMo starting and a massive amount of reluctance on my part to watch the second film. Every time I did my soul started to spontaneously combust.

But, someone recently reminded me of my pledge and I realized I have this more or less finished review of the first film sitting in my draft folder, so I might as well post it. At some point in the future I may attempt to do something with the sequel (like maybe a Let’s Watch) but I’m making no promises; there’s only a certain amount of bullshit I can tolerate, as unlikely as that seems.

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Watch_Dogs

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It’s important to recognize what kind of story Watch Underscore Dogs is before you go into it. This is a hacking game where the “hacking” involves “data streams”, where you can burst steam pipes with a smartphone, where you for some reason need to be looking at something before you can hack it. Its depiction of super-rad underground hacker vigilantes (because in this game hackers are either super-rad underground criminals or super-rad underground vigilantes) is firmly rooted in the mid-90s mentality that hackers wear trenchcoats and put on sunglasses before they do awesome hacks. That’s the kind of story Watch Underscore Dogs wants to tell- vapid, mindless and shallow. And that’s before we even get to its protagonist or its massive incompetence at writing women.

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